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MBLOOPER.M32
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1996-04-21
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27KB
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969 lines
488
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Famous Translation Bloopers
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
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By Man and Computer
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---------PAUSE 3 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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The following
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"translation bloopers"
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come from a variety
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of sources. Many--though
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by no means all--were
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first published
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as fillers in
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a newsletter
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for translators.
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11 0021200 0321 01716011 1
---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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Although such errors
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do not show the work
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of translators in its
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best light, it is
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nonetheless fairly
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clear to everyone
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that such outrageous
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errors must be the
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work of poor translators,
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beginning translators,
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or simply non-translators
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out of their depth.
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---------PAUSE 7 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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But most important,
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these excerpts are
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FUNNY,
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sometimes hilariously
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so. Many have been
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reprinted in a variety
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of publications over
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the last two decades.
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---------PAUSE 4 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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But those who merely laugh
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should perhaps think
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twice: anyone who fails to
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seek out qualified
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translators runs the
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risk that their own
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translated texts could
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sound like the examples
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that follow.
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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NOTE:
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There are
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no spelling errors
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in these examples.
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Or rather all spelling
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is reproduced exactly
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as it was in the
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original texts.
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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In Belgium the General
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Motors slogan
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"Body by Fisher"
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turned into
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"Corpse by Fisher."
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
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"To avoid embarrassment,
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use Parker Superquink"
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became
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"To avoid pregnancy..."
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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A French soft drink
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and a Japanese
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coffee creamer
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failed to flourish
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in US markets.
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Their names were,
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respectively,
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"Pshitt" and "Creap."
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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From a company promoting
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Hong Kong and Italian
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imports:
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---------PAUSE 4 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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Hello!
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How are you?
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Dear; good friend of mine.
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Do you want to be successful
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in the USA?
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You must have to open commun-
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ication with me and 100%
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believe me.
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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You must be going to a world
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of professionalism and
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newfashionably.
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You must be able to keeping
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your patience qualify
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potentiality anytime.
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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You must be able to maketrue
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and be careful!
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You must know the time is
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money!
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I wish you success!
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I wish you powerful!
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I wish you good health and
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happy on everyday!
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Thank a million for your
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patronage my letter!
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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From a "Visitor's Card"
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at a Russian hotel:
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When leaving Your room
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do not fail to forget
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to switch off the
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electrical gudgets....
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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The classic menu at
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a famous Polish restaurant:
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Salad a firm's own make.
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Limpid red beet soup
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with cheesy dumplings in
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the form of a finger.
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---------PAUSE 7 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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A slice of bovine meat.
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Roasted duck let loose.
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Beef rashers beaten up
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in the country people
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fashion.
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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All these examples
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came from poor or
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inexperienced or simply
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NON-translators.
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But now let's see if
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"Machine Translation"
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fares any better.
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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In the most famous example
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of Machine Translation,
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
"The Spirit is Willing,
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But the Flesh is Weak."
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may have become in Russian:
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"The Vodka is Strong,
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But the Meat is Rotten."
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---------PAUSE 7 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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Machine Translation
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advocates claim this
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never happened, though
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some believe it could have.
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The following examples
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have been fully confirmed
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by the author.
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---------PAUSE 7 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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Many United Nations
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documents can be found
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in six languages.
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
The next 9 screens
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compare English versions of
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UN texts with translations
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from UN Spanish, created by
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a well-known computer program.
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---------PAUSE 7 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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UN English Original
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
915021200 0321 01716011 1
915021200 0321 01716011 1
915021200 0321 01716011 1
915021200 0321 01716011 1
915021200 0321 01716011 1
915021200 0321 01716011 1
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Computer Text (from Spanish)
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---------PAUSE 2 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
015011111 0 0 0 0 0011 1
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...the preamble to the
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Organization's Charter...
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...the preamble to
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the Letter of the
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Organization...
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1415021200 0321 01716011 1
---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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...the peoples of the
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United Nations declare...
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
1415021200 0321 01716011 1
...the towns of the
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United Nations declare...
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1415021200 0321 01716011 1
---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
015011111 0 0 0 0 0011 1
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...the civil and
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political rights...
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
1415021200 0321 01716011 1
...the straight civilians
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and political...
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1415021200 0321 01716011 1
---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
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...including:
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...In such sensitive,
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you/he/she/it are
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specified the
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following:
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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...freedom from torture or
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cruel, inhuman or
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degrading treatment
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or punishment;...
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Nobody will be subjected
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to tortures neither to woe
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or cruel deals, inhuman
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or [degradientes];...
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
015011111 0 0 0 0 0011 1
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...the right to recognition
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as a person before
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the law...
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1415021200 0321 01716011 1
...a right to the
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reconnaissance of their
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artificial personality...
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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...the right to be
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presumed innocent
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until proved guilty...
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...a right to that I/he/
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she/it/you am presumed
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their innocence in their
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guilt is not proven...
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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...the right to
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rest and leisure;
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...the law to the rest
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and I to the enjoy
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of the free time;
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14 0021200 0321 01716011 1
---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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...the right
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to education;
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
1415021200 0321 01716011 1
...the law
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to the manners;
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---------PAUSE 4 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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The lesson here,
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if any, is this:
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Yes, untrained human
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translators can make
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terrible mistakes.
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But computer methods are
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likely to do it all the time.
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Unless humans are
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willing to help...
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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"Machine translation"
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CAN
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be useful in certain
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specialized situations.
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
But even here, some
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doubts remain concerning
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how cost- and
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time-effective it may be.
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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But let's not
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pick on dumb
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machines!
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Back to human errors!
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Fortunately--so far at
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least--they are
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far rarer.
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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In a Bucharest hotel
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lobby:
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The lift is being fixed
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for the next day.
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During that time we
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regret that you
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will be unbearable.
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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Sign touting
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donkey rides
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in Thailand:
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
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Would you like
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to ride
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on your own ass?
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---------PAUSE 4 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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A (former) Yugoslavian
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hotel:
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The flattening
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of underwear with
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pleasure is the
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job of the
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chambermaid.
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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In a Copenhagen
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airline office:
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We take your bags
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and send them
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in all directions.
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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In a Norwegian
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cocktail lounge:
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Ladies are requested
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not to have children
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at the bar.
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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At a very posh
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Acapulco hotel:
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The manager
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has personally
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passed all the water
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served here.
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---------PAUSE 6 SECONDS--------
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----------CLEAR SCREEN----------
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The full version of
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this program contains
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three times as many
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Bloopers (and over
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twice as much of everything
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else) as this version.
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915021200 0321 01716011 1
See the file ORDER.DOC
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if you wish to obtain it.
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---------PAUSE 5 SECONDS--------
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This is the end
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of Part 2.
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Part 3 will begin in
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5
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seconds.
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1
